No matter whether you are a mother x 10, have just become a mother, or are just about to become a mother, you know that having a child will truly change your life. And, as you have probably figured out by now, there are women out there on this journey that know the secret truths about motherhood. They’ve just never bothered to share them with anyone.
Sure, you will receive constant criticism (advice) from your own mom and accept kindly hints and tips from your friends, but you’ll find the subsequent lifestyle transition from a single entity to the all-encompassing role of mom can be confusing, isolating, and overwhelming.
And so, when you are wondering if anyone has ever felt the same way as you, remember these basic truths about motherhood and know that you are not alone:
You may become a hermit
Although you had a seemingly active social life prior to becoming a mom, when you just decided at the drop of a hat that you would go away for the evening or even just go up and do some shopping at the mall, once you have your baby your liklihood of becoming a hermit increases greatly. By hermit I mean someone who doesn’t leave the house and interact with the real world other than grocery shopping and/or the occasional jaunt to the playground.
Why is it so easy to tuck yourself away? The answer is simple: You must now weigh the pros and cons of physically leaving the house. How tired am I today? How many times is too many times to chase after little 2 year old Billy as he tries to frantically break into traffic? How badly do I want that box of Mini-Wheats? Let’s face it, it’s easier to deal with runaway toddlers or babies who get overstimulated by bright lights in the safety of your own home.
You can lose track of time when you are a mom, and feel isolated and lonely during what should be one of the happier times in your life. Fight against the natural instinct to hermit yourself in your house. Social interactions will help you get through the stressful times.
Google will become thine enemy
Google is great for searching, especially when the things you are searching for do not hold any personal attachments for you. If your baby is up at 3 am with a nasty fever and appears to have a tummy ache, you turn to your computer almost as quickly as you call the health line.
The problem? Google will pull up every horrifying childhood ailment that you can imagine, and then when you click on the page, you will be aghast because your child could possibly have those symptoms (see honey, her arm is wiggling just like in that picture!!).
Google is not a replacement for your doctor, and Googling things will only scare the life out of you and add a significant amount of stress to your already stressful situation. The result will be a baby who recovers within 24 hours and a mom who needs a prescription for Ativan just to get back to normal.
You will be deeply affected by the weather
Weather is for old people, right?
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Chatting about the weather and frantically checking the forecast on your iPhone is a habit you will get into at a very young age (and let me tell you, there have been many times that I’d like to throw that iPhone against the wall for showing nothing but rain and cool temperatures for 7 days). Weather affects a mom, because it means that you have to put on your thinking cap and find stuff for your kids to do inside. It means no toasty warm summer days outside in the sunshine, building sand castles or watching the animals at the zoo.
A good climate is a must for raising children. Trust me, if it rains every day, you will think of nothing but the weather.
Like the rest of your life, motherhood is more than just a transition you go through once they place your baby in your arms. Motherhood is an adventure, one with river rapids and calm, coasting along the water (or so they tell me, I haven’t coasted in a long, long time).
When you feel overwhelmed, remember: It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey. And aren’t you lucky to be going on this journey?
Feel free to share the truths you’ve learned about motherhood.